Over the years I’ve worked with many tennis coaches and some still stand out. A skill my favorite tennis coaches share is an ability to provide incisive instruction with minimal words. For example, when I repeatedly try to drive the ball down the line but it sails out or in the net, my coach Laura might say, “the cross-court return is the highest percentage shot.” She’s not telling me what to do; she’s observing my behavior and offering insight. The same skill works for leaders – it’s the skill of observational feedback.
Our company, Crafted Leadership, trains leaders and teams in the principles and practices of conscious leadership (a subject I’ve written about here). One of our most popular training topics is Giving Feedback. You can read more about our approach to feedback here.
One of the three types of feedback we teach leaders and teams to offer is observational feedback.
With observational feedback, the feedback giver assumes the other person may not know something or may have a blind spot. The intention is to build awareness in the other person. The giver trusts that the recipient will make any changes they deem appropriate as a result of your observation.
Examples of observational feedback include:
- I noticed when Travis asked for new ideas on improving the breakroom, you were silent even though you had previously shared many ideas with me.
- Your blog list of the 10 best novels of all time features only European authors.
- Everyone on the board pledged to testify about the need for affordable housing, and I noticed you did not appear at the public hearing.
- I noticed that you finished Gwen’s sentences for her.
- Only 5% of your leadership team opted to take part in the training you mandated for the company.
A member of one of our Lead by Design Advanced groups told me she noticed I allowed another member to stay in reactive mode during one of our forums. In providing this feedback, the observer didn’t ask me to do anything different, she simply made the observation. That was all I needed. That kind of non-judgmental feedback is often all that’s needed for people to develop self-awareness. Because a central premise of our leadership work is to support one another to stay out of reactivity, her observation was a gift for my self-awareness. I agreed with her and recommitted to naming the drama triangle when I see it and supporting leaders to shift.
Observational feedback is nonjudgmental attention that allows the recipient to take 100% responsibility for the shared information. As a result, observational feedback is ideal for coaching and mentoring. A step-by-step worksheet of how to provide observational (and other) feedback can be found here.
Observational feedback works because many people don’t need overt instruction – they’re already wired to look for ways to improve. What they could use MORE OF is non-judgmental attention and the generosity of someone providing that attention who has their best interest in mind.
If you’d like to learn how to give feedback effectively, we offer 90-minute virtual trainings on the topic. Sign up here. If you’d like to have Julianna or myself train your team in giving and receiving feedback, email us at nancy@craftedleadership.com or julianna@craftedleadership.com.